[Ace just scoffs, settling in on top of his new Trinket bed.]
If you think I'm gonna call you Lady, you have another thing comin'. You're lucky I add enough letters to even call you Vex, a irmã.
[He is going to finish sprawling out with a very content sigh, though, humming for a moment before... slowly answering.]
It's... I've been thinking, since this showed up. [He just wiggles his left arm, that ASCE out and on display.] How do you know if you have... other memories?
Oh don't worry, darling, I'm not holding my breath.
[ she gives Trinket another scratch as the bear huffs, adjusting to the weight on his back, before Vex also leans against him. if anything she expects him not really to answer, to flip the subject to something else entirely. she shifts herself to face him, resting her hand on the top of Trinket's head. ]
That's... [ Vex exhales. ] I'm not sure. I got flashes of people I couldn't possibly know and things I couldn't possibly have done. [ like flying on a broom, fighting dragons, marrying the love of her life. ] I still do.
[Normally, he would. He'd change the subject, avoid any kind of serious emotional answer. Normally, Ace would fight tooth and nail to avoid having a serious conversation.
But...
There's something about this. Some heavy feeling in his chest, a pain that hurts more than anything he's ever felt before in his life. A pain that he's so desperate to cling to, because it means something important.
He just... can't put his finger on it.]
... people I couldn't possibly know and things I couldn't possibly have done, huh? [Ace pauses, thinking for a good long moment, before saying so, so quietly: ] That's a pretty good description, honestly.
[ Vex watches silently as his thoughts all but flash across his features. slight twitches that most would miss but Vex easily picks up on. she has always been good at watching people, reading them, it served her well in her years wandering the seedier parts of the world. and it's become second nature in more recent days.
absently the half-elf scratches behind her bear's ear, Trinket contentedly rumbling under the attention, only to break the contact to reach up and poke Ace in the middle of his forehead. ]
I know it is. [ poke poke. ] And there is something rattling around in that head of yours that has spooked you, isn't there?
[Thankfully for Vex, Ace is an open book. He’s never been good at hiding how he feels, has never really bothered to, even with total strangers. So with people he considers family? Well. He might as well be screaming every single thing he’s thinking.]
........ yeah, there is. [Ace sighs, almost like he’s blowing all the air out of his body, practically melting down into Trinket’s fur as he does.]. I think, in whatever past life I lived, I had a huge family.
[People all around him, drinking and feasting and celebrating, sitting with him during quiet nights around crackling fires, screaming crying and bleeding clashing and clashing and falling, staining ice and stone and sea red and all he can do is watch as the only family he had left charge to their deaths trying to save someone who never deserved being saved—]
she had a family once, not one bound by blood but a family nonetheless. words do not begin to describe how much she misses them, how much her heart aches whenever her thoughts drift to them─ to Vax. Vex shifts up onto her knees and wraps her arms around Ace, resting her forehead against his. ]
If you blame yourself for their decisions... [ pot calling kettle. hasn't she thought the same over the years? blamed herself for losing her brother? for potentially being the cause of his death? ] People sometimes do insane things for those they love. Sometimes they even do something so utterly foolish like challenging a god.
[ and dooming themselves to be lost to their family forevermore. ]
You can't hold onto a guilt like that, it will only hurt you.
[Ah-- well. It's been a while since Ace has gotten a hug. It's enough to distract him from the life he's been getting glances of, to have him letting out a breath and leaning tiredly into that contact, his eyes sliding closed.
He's... tired. He's done so much thinking since getting back from the Event Horizon, his brain might as well be dribbling out of his ears.]
A god, huh...? Your gods didn't happen to cause earthquakes strong enough to split the ocean, freeze an entire island, or conjure lava out of nothing, did they? [He pauses, and lets out a little huff.] I just-- how can I not feel guilty when I remember some of their names?
[When he can remember sitting on a giant's shoulder, laughing and talking and weaving reeds into a hat? When he remembers the life leaving those impossibly large eyes, body fallen on top of a crumbling wall, hand desperately outstretched towards him?]
[ it is unsettling how much of what he asks rings familiar. how effortlessly those words drag up flashes of images from the depths; fire that follows impossibly large wings, biting cold ice, the roar of dragons as their home all but crumbles around them, black feathers and the crow of ravens. ]
If they wanted too, I suppose. [ draped over Trinket her grip on him tightens as his eyes slide closed, sparing him from the pained expression that finds Vex's face mere second later. ] I'm not saying don't feel guilty, I'm saying─ [ she exhales heavily, her own eyes sliding closed. ] You can't hold onto it and let it fester forever.
[ her chest aches, that empty space where Vax should sit all but crying out for her twin. ]
I have a brother, a twin brother. In our past life he gave himself over to a god because of me, he gave his life to a god to save me. [ Vex's grip tightens more and she trembles softly. ] All because I was too blind to realize the treasure we were looking for was obviously trapped. And because of that one decision I lost him forever. At the end of everything she took him from me.
[ had she not died that day, had she not fallen from that trap. would Vax have been able to live out the rest of his days with them? with Keyleth? would he have met the family that she and Percy made together? ]
It was my fault, in the end, and if I held onto that guilt forever I never would have lived my life to it's fullest. I never would have made a family with the man that I loved. It would have consumed me.
Something about that stings at Ace's mind, pulls at his heart. A brother. A lost brother. The pain he feels, listening to Vex, taking in her hurt, her cautionary words, it's familiar in a way he can't quite put his finger on.
He just feels that sometimes, people can die for no good reason at all. And you're forced to live out your life without them in it.
In the end, all Ace can do is adjust himself on their therapy bear, returning the hug that Vex had offered to him in full, arms wrapped around her tight and secure.]
... your brother sounds really cool, though. And... a lot like the guys I remember. [The ones so ready to fight a war to save Ace's life. The ones that refused to stop moving forward until their very last breath.
Ace tightens his grip on Vex, squeezing her in that hug for a moment more before he pulls back, giving her his best grin, despite the way all of this turmoil has left him a little drawn, with bags under his eyes.] Hey-- do you have sake, by any chance?
[ she's supposed to be the one comforting him and yet the moment Ace shifts and wraps his arms around her she feels something shift. something snap. Vex breathes in, sharp and short, ache blooming from the center of her chest. this kind of hug, it's different from when she hugs Percy, it's comforting, assuring, familial and gods she hasn't been held like this for years.
tears well in her eyes only held back by a stifled laugh and a butt load of determination. can't have him seeing her cry over something so simple as a hug. ]
Don't let him hear you say that. [ Vex sniffs, trying not to bury herself against him. ] You'll inflate his ego and he's insufferable when he gets like that.
[ but what she would give to have him here right now, to hear Vax's stupid shitty comments about her getting emotional and how Ace thinks he's just really cool. Ace pulls back and Vex shifts trying to hide wiping the tears from her eyes with a strategic hair tuck, she might've gotten away with it were they not so close. or if Trinket didn't immediately make a worried "row?" up at her. ]
Sake? There should be a bottle in the kitchen. [ honestly? isn't at all her drink of choice, but you don't turn away gifts from the kindly old Japanese lady you visit on a biweekly basis. ]
[Ace may be a bit simple sometimes, or maybe seems downright dumb, but— well, it’s not that he’s actually stupid. There’s a difference between not understanding the world around you and just deciding to just never really even try to use your entire brain.
But boy has Ace been slowly getting those wheels turning again, these past few days. And unfortunately for Vex, that means he’s well aware of what that little hair tuck is covering up.
At the very least, he doesn’t address those tears out loud, instead just shifting to push himself back to his feet, reaching down and gently ruffling Vex’s hair as he passes her and goes to find his way to the kitchen. Though he does call back to Trinket with a quick: ] Take care of her for a minute, okay, bud?
[And, after a few minutes and probably a fair amount of concerning clattering around in the kitchen, Ace is coming back with a bottle of sake and two cups.
He sits himself down on the ground in front of Vex, setting the cups down, one in front of himself and the other in front of her, before carefully pouring a small amount into both.]
I remembered this, when we were talking. My past life, if that’s what it is— that world had this tradition with exchanging sake cups. It can mark alliances and loyalty, but if you share equal sized cups from the same bottle— [He grins, bright and lopsided, as he picks up and offers Vex’s cup to her.] That’s how you pledge to be family.
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If you think I'm gonna call you Lady, you have another thing comin'. You're lucky I add enough letters to even call you Vex, a irmã.
[He is going to finish sprawling out with a very content sigh, though, humming for a moment before... slowly answering.]
It's... I've been thinking, since this showed up. [He just wiggles his left arm, that A
SCE out and on display.] How do you know if you have... other memories?no subject
Oh don't worry, darling, I'm not holding my breath.
[ she gives Trinket another scratch as the bear huffs, adjusting to the weight on his back, before Vex also leans against him. if anything she expects him not really to answer, to flip the subject to something else entirely. she shifts herself to face him, resting her hand on the top of Trinket's head. ]
That's... [ Vex exhales. ] I'm not sure. I got flashes of people I couldn't possibly know and things I couldn't possibly have done. [ like flying on a broom, fighting dragons, marrying the love of her life. ] I still do.
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But...
There's something about this. Some heavy feeling in his chest, a pain that hurts more than anything he's ever felt before in his life. A pain that he's so desperate to cling to, because it means something important.
He just... can't put his finger on it.]
... people I couldn't possibly know and things I couldn't possibly have done, huh? [Ace pauses, thinking for a good long moment, before saying so, so quietly: ] That's a pretty good description, honestly.
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absently the half-elf scratches behind her bear's ear, Trinket contentedly rumbling under the attention, only to break the contact to reach up and poke Ace in the middle of his forehead. ]
I know it is. [ poke poke. ] And there is something rattling around in that head of yours that has spooked you, isn't there?
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........ yeah, there is. [Ace sighs, almost like he’s blowing all the air out of his body, practically melting down into Trinket’s fur as he does.]. I think, in whatever past life I lived, I had a huge family.
[People all around him, drinking and feasting and celebrating, sitting with him during quiet nights around crackling fires, screaming crying and bleeding clashing and clashing and falling, staining ice and stone and sea red and all he can do is watch as the only family he had left charge to their deaths trying to save someone who never deserved being saved—]
And... I think a lot of them died because of me.
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she had a family once, not one bound by blood but a family nonetheless. words do not begin to describe how much she misses them, how much her heart aches whenever her thoughts drift to them─ to Vax. Vex shifts up onto her knees and wraps her arms around Ace, resting her forehead against his. ]
If you blame yourself for their decisions... [ pot calling kettle. hasn't she thought the same over the years? blamed herself for losing her brother? for potentially being the cause of his death? ] People sometimes do insane things for those they love. Sometimes they even do something so utterly foolish like challenging a god.
[ and dooming themselves to be lost to their family forevermore. ]
You can't hold onto a guilt like that, it will only hurt you.
no subject
He's... tired. He's done so much thinking since getting back from the Event Horizon, his brain might as well be dribbling out of his ears.]
A god, huh...? Your gods didn't happen to cause earthquakes strong enough to split the ocean, freeze an entire island, or conjure lava out of nothing, did they? [He pauses, and lets out a little huff.] I just-- how can I not feel guilty when I remember some of their names?
[When he can remember sitting on a giant's shoulder, laughing and talking and weaving reeds into a hat? When he remembers the life leaving those impossibly large eyes, body fallen on top of a crumbling wall, hand desperately outstretched towards him?]
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If they wanted too, I suppose. [ draped over Trinket her grip on him tightens as his eyes slide closed, sparing him from the pained expression that finds Vex's face mere second later. ] I'm not saying don't feel guilty, I'm saying─ [ she exhales heavily, her own eyes sliding closed. ] You can't hold onto it and let it fester forever.
[ her chest aches, that empty space where Vax should sit all but crying out for her twin. ]
I have a brother, a twin brother. In our past life he gave himself over to a god because of me, he gave his life to a god to save me. [ Vex's grip tightens more and she trembles softly. ] All because I was too blind to realize the treasure we were looking for was obviously trapped. And because of that one decision I lost him forever. At the end of everything she took him from me.
[ had she not died that day, had she not fallen from that trap. would Vax have been able to live out the rest of his days with them? with Keyleth? would he have met the family that she and Percy made together? ]
It was my fault, in the end, and if I held onto that guilt forever I never would have lived my life to it's fullest. I never would have made a family with the man that I loved. It would have consumed me.
no subject
Something about that stings at Ace's mind, pulls at his heart. A brother. A lost brother. The pain he feels, listening to Vex, taking in her hurt, her cautionary words, it's familiar in a way he can't quite put his finger on.
He just feels that sometimes, people can die for no good reason at all. And you're forced to live out your life without them in it.
In the end, all Ace can do is adjust himself on their therapy bear, returning the hug that Vex had offered to him in full, arms wrapped around her tight and secure.]
... your brother sounds really cool, though. And... a lot like the guys I remember. [The ones so ready to fight a war to save Ace's life. The ones that refused to stop moving forward until their very last breath.
Ace tightens his grip on Vex, squeezing her in that hug for a moment more before he pulls back, giving her his best grin, despite the way all of this turmoil has left him a little drawn, with bags under his eyes.] Hey-- do you have sake, by any chance?
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tears well in her eyes only held back by a stifled laugh and a butt load of determination. can't have him seeing her cry over something so simple as a hug. ]
Don't let him hear you say that. [ Vex sniffs, trying not to bury herself against him. ] You'll inflate his ego and he's insufferable when he gets like that.
[ but what she would give to have him here right now, to hear Vax's stupid shitty comments about her getting emotional and how Ace thinks he's just really cool. Ace pulls back and Vex shifts trying to hide wiping the tears from her eyes with a strategic hair tuck, she might've gotten away with it were they not so close. or if Trinket didn't immediately make a worried "row?" up at her. ]
Sake? There should be a bottle in the kitchen. [ honestly? isn't at all her drink of choice, but you don't turn away gifts from the kindly old Japanese lady you visit on a biweekly basis. ]
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But boy has Ace been slowly getting those wheels turning again, these past few days. And unfortunately for Vex, that means he’s well aware of what that little hair tuck is covering up.
At the very least, he doesn’t address those tears out loud, instead just shifting to push himself back to his feet, reaching down and gently ruffling Vex’s hair as he passes her and goes to find his way to the kitchen. Though he does call back to Trinket with a quick: ] Take care of her for a minute, okay, bud?
[And, after a few minutes and probably a fair amount of concerning clattering around in the kitchen, Ace is coming back with a bottle of sake and two cups.
He sits himself down on the ground in front of Vex, setting the cups down, one in front of himself and the other in front of her, before carefully pouring a small amount into both.]
I remembered this, when we were talking. My past life, if that’s what it is— that world had this tradition with exchanging sake cups. It can mark alliances and loyalty, but if you share equal sized cups from the same bottle— [He grins, bright and lopsided, as he picks up and offers Vex’s cup to her.] That’s how you pledge to be family.